Day 35
Dear Diary,
A typical apocalypse morning. My wife issued my quarantine ration: a square and a half of toilet paper and three coffee beans. Joke is on her, though. Since I’ve been squeezing the cheeks for two days I still have yesterday’s ration. Three squares baby.
Thank god for squat cheeks (never skip leg day)!
“Thank god for squat cheeks!”
Mental Note: I do not think that is what they mean by three squares.
Now, if she doesn’t discover that I’ve been keistering coffee beans, by next Friday I may have enough for a full cup of coffee.
Don’t judge, in some cultures that is a delicacy.
* APOCALYPSE UPDATE *
The CDC reports that taking a brisk 15 minute walk every day, particularly if you walk outside and get direct exposure to sunlight, gives your wife 15 minute that you do not annoy her.
Author: Ken Gack
Ken does his own butt modeling.
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