Day 15

Dear Diary,

The curve has not flattened.

If I read their charts correctly, the CDC is quite certain we are all going to die.

Some day.

Probably from hitting their curve at too great a speed, losing control, and careening right off their charts.

Or from the apocalypse virus.

Or from syphilis.

Or something.

* APOCALYPSE UPDATE *

Ken Gack reports that 15 is in fact greater than 14, and the CDC’s mathing skills are suspect.

Author: Ken Gack

Ken learned how to count to 14 in kindergarten. He is pretty sure this is some bollshit right here!